Tips To Deal With An Office Romance Gone Sour   | Fusion - WeRIndia

Tips To Deal With An Office Romance Gone Sour  

Office romance gone sour

In the current work environment, office romances are a dime a dozen.

Work, after all, is the place where many people spend more than a third of their lives, and it’s possibly one of the best places where employees can find a potential mate who shares similar life goals and attitudes.

It makes sense: spending long hours in close quarters with like-minded people can be a major relationship catalyst.

But as it happens, romances can turn sour – and in an office, that can bring out some serious awkwardness.

You can just take so many sick days before people start to realize what’s really going on.

If you also find yourself in this tricky situation, here are few tips for keeping things professional and moving on from an office romance that has gone down the drain:

Keep it Private

Discussing your office romance and break up with co-workers can lead to rumors and speculations around the office place. It’s never a great thing to have your name attached to work place drama. That’s a soap opera you never want to be a part of.

When a relationship ends, it’s totally normal to share your heartbreak (or anger, frustration, maybe even relief) with anyone who will lend a sympathetic ear. But when that relationship was an office romance, you need to handle the situation with a little more tact and discretion.

If you are conducting a relationship with another employee and things are getting serious, you want your boss to hear it directly from you, not through office gossip

Take some time to process your emotions, swallow your pride and come up with a strategy for when you are inevitably forced to work with this person.

That can be difficult when things are still raw, but keep in mind that it’s easier to bite your tongue than to explain to your manager why you were belittling your former significant other during a team brainstorm.

It’s acceptable to tell friends if they are not going to talk about it, however, you should preferably share it with those friends who do not have any connections with your workplace.

Check the company’s policies

Before launching into an office romance, be clear on the company’s policies regarding office relationships.

Know the rules regarding workplace romance. Many companies large and small have hard and fast rules against relationships developing between co-workers.

If it is against the rules, you should ask yourself: “Is it worth it?” And, if it is, be discreet and prepare for any consequences.

It’s always better if you are aware of the regulations and rules by which you should work, inform yourself and your partner about what policies the firm has in place regarding conducting a romantic relationship in the workplace.


Talk it Out

Hopefully, you two discussed how y

ou were going to keep your relationship out of the workplace before you started deleting every trace of your time together from Facebook and Instagram.

But it goes without saying that the most important thing to do now is not let this affect your work performance or reputation.

Let’s acknowledge that you are going to run into this person a lot, maybe even every day. If you want to avoid becoming the gossip at the coffee machine, you need to broker some ground rules with the person whose favorite hoodie you just threw away.

Set aside your personal differences for now and talk through what implications ending the relationship has in professional terms: How will you break the news to co-workers? How will you interact at work? What level of communication will you maintain?

Maintain a Distance

Still feeling that overwhelming rush of sadness every time, you see them pass by? Breakup anxiety can be a distraction that can make doing your job feel nearly impossible some days. Ease some of that emotional strain with a tactic straight from your high school playbook and simply avoid them.

This may sound a bit juvenile, but when the wounds are still fresh, mixing up your old routine can really help dissipate some of that lingering sadness. Try arriving at work a bit earlier. Use a different entrance so you don’t have to walk by their desk. Find a new lunch spot and ask a different co-worker to eat with you. And cut off unnecessary lines of communication.

No, you can’t tell your boss that you’re skipping the quarterly review just to avoid seeing your ex. But for the day to day, out of sight can really be out of mind.

Don’t allow your relationship to impact your work

You can send text messages using your cell phone if necessary, but aside from that nothing pertaining to your relationship should become a source of distraction or affect your performance at work.

You are risking your professional future if you shirk your work duties for the sake of a relationship.

Stay busy while at work and spare no time to risk exposure.

If you don’t stay busy, you’ll be thinking more about your partner or you may go out of your way to plan interactive opportunities.

Avoid Office Rebounds

It can be tempting to look for a rebound relationship in the workplace, especially when your former significant other is already bragging about someone new they met online.

But this is a recipe for disaster that could turn minor workplace drama into the stuff of office legend. Remember, it takes years to build a professional reputation and only minutes to lose it.

Instead, focus your energy toward a new work project. Getting lost in your job will make you forget about that pit in your stomach and will seriously impress everyone with your professionalism and poise.

Navigating the emotional twists and turns of any breakup can be treacherous. That becomes even more daunting when the person you hate the most right now works just down the hall.

Maintain decorum and professionalism

Set “strictly business” boundaries and be professional about it.

As an employee, your main priority is to your job duties and responsibilities and if you should continue to work with the person you would rather not see, it is best to set strictly work boundaries.

Communication via work email and work phone for work purposes only.

Just because the after-hour hang outs and phone chats have stopped doesn’t mean you can’t remain cordial to them during work hours at work.

When it’s an office romance, the stakes are even higher.

If there’s evidence that an office romance is affecting work, one or both of you may be asked to end your romance or, worse yet, find another job.


Consider leaving OR Move on

If the relationship does get serious, one member should consider a new position outside the company.

After a particularly painful office breakup, you may be asking yourself whether you should change teams, departments or even quit and find a new job altogether. But avoid making a rash decision.

Give yourself time to move on – don’t give up on your dream job and move across the country over something as trivial as a failed romance.

Photo by Avi Richards on Unsplash (Free for commercial use)

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